Do You Ever Put Too Much Pressure On Yourself?

Last week a friend and I had to laugh at each other as we spoke on our mobiles from our sick beds. Not because we were both ill, but because we both recognised the irony of teaching the importance of being kind to ourselves, and yet knowing working too hard had contributed to us being ill!

The desire to enjoy a better work/life balance was one of the main drivers for me going into business. As well as wanting to do something I loved that made a difference in the world.

When I was ‘employed’, it was easy to ‘blame’ others for the need for me to work late at the office. But one of the great lessons of being self-employed is the realisation that I’m the common denominator – the person who still finds maintaining a good work/life balance challenging.

  • I have chosen to work long hours.
  • It’s been me who defines ambitious timeframes for rolling out new products and services.
  • I’ve been the one who has tried to do too much at the same time rather than focussing on one thing at a time.
  • I’m the person who decided to move to a new computer system – even though I knew it would mean needing to put other planned activities back.
  • It’s been me putting pressure on myself.

Can you relate to any of this?

If yes, it may worth accepting (as I have done) that you are the only person who can change this!

Sometimes I wonder why I’m so driven to do or achieve more, when I’m really happy with my life. And I hear myself coming up with excuses such as:

  • it’s because I LOVE my work and want to help as many people as possible through what I do.
  • it’s my way of living a life of meaning, when I’ve not had children.

Through exploring this it’s been a shock to recently realise:

  • I’ve associated living a purposeful life to ‘doing’ rather than ‘being’.
  • I’ve felt a need to continually help more people, rather than knowing it’s OK to focus on helping those most important to me. I am already good enough! I don’t need to ‘prove’ this through doing more.
  • that when I work too many hours, no matter what the driver, I am not being kind to myself.

Thankfully I am more consciously aware of the lifestyle I’d like to live, the people I love being around, what energises me, and the part I play in creating my day-to-day experience.

I’m also much better at paying attention to the signs (such as a lack of energy, headaches or not feeling well) that it’s time to take remedial action, and I let my body guide me to what it would be good for me to do.

Today I choose to change these habits and be kinder to myself going forward knowing:

  • It’s OK to not achieve all I set out to do in a day, week or month.
  • I always do the best I can with the resources I have available to me each day.
  • just as you can’t have rainbows without rain, there are often downsides to our positive traits – it’s how we manage these that is important.
  • working fewer hours will enable me to enjoy life even more.
  • I deserve to be happy, healthy and successful.

I’m full of gratitude that I know so many ways for creating new healthier habits.

I feel so much more energised by the thought of spending more time each day tapping, meditating, doing yoga, going for walks on the beach and connecting with family and friends. And I’m delighted the blessing that’s come from being ill the last few weeks – that my friend and I have decided to take every Friday afternoon off. Rather than working to enjoy ‘Fun Fridays’ together re-discovering the fountain of youth.

If you ever put too much pressure on yourself, remember you are the only person who can change this. A good starting point is to become aware of the part you play in creating the situation and by asking yourself:

  • How would I prefer things to be?
  • What could I do differently to make this happen?
  • What would it be good for me to let go of?
  • What daily habits could I adopt to help me be kinder to myself?

I find tapping is a great way to let go of any feelings of stress or overwhelm and is often great at helping work out the best way forward. And I share more about tapping and many other practical tools and techniques to boost your happiness and success in my book Heartatude, The 9 Principles Of Heart-Centered Success. 

If you’d like any help in letting go of any stress or overwhelm, please do contact me to find out how I can help.

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Alisoun Mackenzie is The Compassionate Business Mentor, Author, and Speaker who inspires business owners and social entrepreneurs to turn their passions into profits and make a difference in the world. 

She is also the author of two Amazon Best Selling books Heartatude, The 9 Principles of Heart-Centered Success and Give to Profit: How to Grow Your Business by Supporting Charities Social Causes.

Alisoun is also the founder of The Heartabiz Hub a business network and training academy and has written the following free ebooks:

  • The 9 Secrets to Signing Up Clients Without Selling (click here)
  • 101 Ways To Attract Great Clients, With Heart, Integrity & Social Impact (click here)
  • 52 Ways to Raise Funds for Charities and Social Causes Through Your Business  (click here)

You can connect with Alisoun here:

  • Alisoun Mackenzie Facebook Fanpage (for tips on authentic living and business mastery) – click HERE
  • The Heartabiz Hub Facebook Fanpage (for details about our courses and events) – click HERE
  • Give To Profit Facebook Fanpage (tips on supporting charities and social causes) – click HERE
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